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Sunday, 6 November 2011

the Internet has many of us on a very short leash – an addictive one.

Whether you’re mid-bite, mid-sentence or perhaps mid-sleep, do you react to that ‘bing’ from your smartphone? Or, is it the flashing red light that gets you?

You’ve programmed your phone to alert you to messages, or has it programmed you to respond?

From the constant smartphone companion to the laptop replacing the lapdog, the Internet has many of us on a very short leash – an addictive one.

The consumer research firm Intersperience surveyed more than 1,000 people in Britain and found quitting the Internet is as hard for some as quitting drinking or smoking.

Without the Internet, 40% said they felt lonely. Ironically, it’s fathomable that 40% of those living with Internet addicts probably feel lonely too.

Laurie Tamblyn, an addictions counsellor in special programs at Toronto’s Bellwood Health Services, says there are many types of Internet addiction, including gambling, gaming, pornography and social networking.

“We’re just beginning to treat this. It is a big problem and it is going to become bigger before people start recognizing that they need to do something about it,” Tamblyn says.

“Some of us believe there is a tsunami coming because we haven’t fully recognized the problem yet.”

Part of that problem is the generation gap. Children today are children of technology – dependent on the social web and its tools.

Addiction is a progressive illness that ends up in isolation, Tamblyn says, so Internet use can be a slippery slope, and can have devastating effects on relationships.

“The amount of time people spend lost in their behaviours is comparable to a drinker spending time at the bar instead of with his family or friends,” Tamblyn says.

“The addiction becomes the focus of the addict’s life. The focus is to interact with the addiction before anything else. If this doesn’t happen, it results in mood swings and irritability.”

Internet addiction can be difficult to diagnose, says Dr. Greg Dubord, who teaches in the psychiatry department at the University of Toronto.

“Drawing the line between normal Internet use and Internet addiction is often difficult, because no set criteria for diagnosing the disorder have been established by the American Psychiatric Association.”

What is easy to recognize, however, is the impact of web overuse on our relationships.

Though social networking allows us to communicate with people all over the world, at times it seems to segregate us more than ever. Real-life interaction is often interrupted by bings and beeps. Thoughts become tweets and e-mails. Our fingers do the walking and the talking now.

From neglecting friends and family members to creating severe relationship problems, the Internet and our attachment to it can consume our lives.

One study documents 396 negative effects of the web on social involvement, including significant family problems, Dubord says.

“Reports have shown that excessive use of the Internet resulted in personal and family problems, with 53% of test-takers reporting severe relationship problems,” he says.

“Personal and family concerns extended to marriages, dating relationships, parent-child relationships, and close friendships.”

Dubord notes one case where a New York woman divorced her husband due to Internet overuse, and an extreme case involving a Korean couple so addicted to virtual games they let their three-month-old daughter starve to death.

If you think you may have a problem, Tamblyn says the best thing to do is ask for help.

“You can get an assessment at any treatment centre, or do it online and it’s anonymous. There are a lot of people struggling, and there’s a lot of help.”

Too e-dependent? Greg Dubord points out some general warning signs:

1. Lose track of time online.

2. Failed attempts at moderating Internet behaviour.

3. Neglecting work, sleep, friends and/or family to spend time online.

4. Turning to the Internet in times of stress or sadness to feel better.

How to cut down, according to Laurie Tamblyn:

1. Give yourself short breaks throughout the day when you can’t check your messages. Try going for a walk without your smartphone.

2. Put your iPad to bed. Set a bedtime for your Internet devices.

3. Wi-Fi-free meals. Wash your hands of wireless devices before eating.

4. Put your computer in a high-traffic area to stay accountable to those around you.

Saturday, 5 November 2011

'I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man. I am very blessed to be who I am.

The 39-year-old, who is a father to three-year-old twins Matteo and Valentino, has been in a relationship with Carlos for four years.

Ricky Martin is apparently keen to marry Carlos Gonzalez (Getty Images)Ricky Martin is apparently keen to marry Carlos Gonzalez (Getty Images)

He chose to apply for Spanish citizenship in order to take advantage of the country's decision to legalise same sex marriage in 2005, reports El Pais.

The government was seemingly pleased to welcome the Livin' La Vida Loca star and, unusually, did not ask him to renounce his Puerto Rican or US citizenship.

Ricky is yet to comment on the reports, but the newspaper claimed he intended to tie the knot in Spain rather than one of the US states that allows same sex marriage, as he wanted to pay tribute to prime minister Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero's support for gay rights.

The singer surprised many of his fans when he came out last year by releasing a statement that read: 'I am proud to say that I am a fortunate homosexual man. I am very blessed to be who I am.'




Friday, 4 November 2011

Italy government hangs by thread as coalition crumbles

 

Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi's fate hung by a thread Friday and desertions from his crumbling centre-right coalition may have already robbed him of the parliamentary numbers he needs to survive. Berlusconi, caught in the crossfire from European powers and a party revolt at home, agreed at a G20 summit in France to IMF monitoring of economic reforms which he has long promised but failed to implement. But this may soon be irrelevant for the Italian leader, who will return to Rome later Friday to face what looks increasingly like a deadly rebellion by his own supporters. With financial markets in turmoil over the situation in Greece and Italy viewed as the next domino to fall in the euro zone crisis, calls are mounting for a new government to carry through reforms convincing enough to regain international confidence. Berlusconi has consistently rejected calls to resign and says the only alternative to him is an early election next spring, rather than the technocrat or national unity government urged by many politicians and commentators. Yields on 10-year Italian bonds reached 6.36 percent by early afternoon, creeping closer to 7 percent, a level which could trigger a so-called "buyers' strike" where investors take fright and refuse to buy the paper. Two deputies from Berlusconi's PDL party this week defected to the centrist UDC, taking his support in the 630-seat lower house of parliament to 314 compared with the 316 he needed to win a confidence vote last month. But at least seven other former loyalists have called for a new government and could vote against the 75-year-old media magnate. "The (ruling) majority seems to be dissolving like a snowman in spring," said respected commentator Stefano Folli in the financial daily Il Sole 24 Ore. Other commentators spoke of an "inexorable" revolt against Berlusconi. Even Defence Ministry undersecretary Guido Crosetto, a Berlusconi loyalist, said on television: "I don't know how many days or weeks the government has left. Certainly a majority relying on a few votes cannot continue for long." PATRONAGE Berlusconi, one of Italy's richest men, still has significant powers of patronage and he and his closest aides are expected to spend the weekend trying to win back support for a parliamentary showdown Tuesday. Some rebels have already threatened to vote against Berlusconi in the vote to sign off on the 2010 budget. Berlusconi faced concerted calls to resign when he lost a previous vote on this routine measure, which was almost unprecedented. Although it is not a confidence motion, he would come under huge pressure if he suffered a second defeat. "Unpopular prescriptions are necessary and this challenge cannot be faced with a 51 percent government," said UDC leader Pier Ferdinando Casini, in a reference to Berlusconi's weakness and a widespread feeling that the reforms can only be passed with a broad consensus. The premier has promised European leaders that he will call a formal confidence motion within 15 days to pass amendments to a budget bill incorporating new measures to stimulate growth and cut Italy's huge debt. That will be in the Senate where he has a more solid majority but it could still bring him down. Berlusconi, beset by a string of sex scandals and court cases, has consistently resisted pressure from groups ranging from a powerful business lobby to the Catholic Church to stand down.

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